How do account for the last few days which
have been a struggle overall but positive things have happened? Uuummm not sure how to put down what I feel
at the moment but I will give it my best.
Well it all started with the confirmation
that my landlord wants to sell up which means a new roof over the growing bald
patch. At first I did not think the news
would be so upsetting until I realized that the flat has been my home for the
last 6 years and I experienced so much in that time. I have grown attached to the place as a
result and it is going to be a wrench if and when we have to leave. One of the downsides to renting I guess. It is a matter of keeping the flat in good
order and seeing how things pan out I guess whilst hunting for a new place to
live. So I guess you could say I am feeling a little sad at the moment.
I also spent rather a long time on the
telephone talking to various organisations and companies trying to sort the
finances out and seek help and advice.
It is amazing how helpful people are if you approach them calmly and
with a cheery tone even if inside you are screaming and pulling your hair
out. There is also no point letting the
emotions out when help is or is not forthcoming, it helps no one, certainly not the
costumer care assistant on the other end of the phone. I don’t now if you remember but I recently
had a battle with a mobile telephone provider when attempting to cancel three
accounts that I had but no longer used.
A battle that involved many phone calls, emails and letters and two debt
recovery agencies and thanks to the help of the agencies a battle I
successfully won. It was interesting that the very people who were chasing an outstanding debt were the people who helped me out and resolved the situation. It strengthens my belief that being open and honest does work and is the right approach. Well a few days ago
letters pertaining to the accounts arrived on the doorstep now stating that the
mobile telephone company now owns me money and that I have to call them to get
it back!
With a smile I gave them a ring on my mobile
phone that is with the same provider and then spend the next 5 minutes going
around the automated menu system trying to find the options I required. Do you think I could, nope not a cat in hells
chance and the reason was a fairly simple one?
Because I had rang on my mobile that uses their service it pick up the
number and tailored the services available to suit the package I have. Now that is all well and good and top marks
for being very clever and using technology to its best but if you are going to
do that at least provide an option to access other services. In the end I had to resort to using a
landline and after being offered an iPad for not leaving I got the refunds
authorised. I did point out that the
accounts were closed when offered the iPad and the response was well if you
open a new one we can make the offer but you have to commit to a minimum 18 month contract.
You have to hand it to these peeps that are nothing but persistent. I had a very helpful conversation with the
local council and although there was very little they could do I at least
learnt something that I can take away for future reference.
I could feel things starting to get on top
of me yesterday and my head was very busy and crowded so something had to be
done, enter stage left my camera. It was
a beautiful day, the sun was shining and there was a gentle breeze toying with
the trees, running along the paths and around the houses. So I arranged to meet up with
a photographer friend of mine but before hand I took the camera for a walk
around the town center and its outskirts.
The moment I stepped out into the sunshine with my camera in hand the
clouds in my head cleared and a spring in my step came back. I spent a few hours prior to meeting my
friend taking photographs; watching the world go by and discovering what had
changed since my last visit. Not much although the town seems to be turning into a hairdressers haven at the moment with two more opening!
Never one to miss out on an opportunity for
some Vivian Maier style self portraits I hunted down anything with a reflective
surface specially if it had different textures or tones and contrast. During me stroll I took a detour through the churchyard,
a place I have visited countless times but on this occasion I spotted something
different. The grounds men had clearly
been cutting the grass and weeds back but for some reason had left a patch
untouched and that got me thinking, how could I incorporate it into a
composition including the church. I must
garner some assuming looks from passers by when working a scene with me
standing, crouching, sitting and laying on the ground. Peeking from around a gravestone or tree or
just laying there looking up at the clouds savouring the moment camera resting
on my chest.
It recharged my batteries, well the mental
ones for sure and I got home feeling a little more at ease with myself. I logged on to my computer to upload the images only to find an email
from someone with reference to one of the items I have for sale, Oh good I
thought an interesting customer! Nope it
turns out to be another seller who is offering the same product only his is
more expensive and he was was a company. The message was to the
affect that I was not allowed to sell this item and if I did not remove it they
would report me to Amazon and I would be in serious trouble. It was written in very broken English so it
took several reads to begin to understand what they meant. So I politely composed a reply stating that I
was a private seller and that I was perfectly entitled to sell my personal
belongs provided they come within Amazons rules and regulations, which they
do. I also added that I had forward they
email on to Amazon for reference. I am not sure what people think when they threaten someone, for them to just role over and do as they are told. Well this chap was and is not going to do that for sure and the best way of dealing with behaviour like that, remain calm, be polite and keep to the facts. Strange
that I have not heard anything from them since!
I also had a visit to the doctors to review my medication and give her an update. The good news is that my blood pressure is heading in the right direction and has gone from being high to be "OK" now. It is not when it should be but it is better than it was. We also discussed timescales for me coming off my anti-depressants and we will review them towards the end of the year. I am still losing weight and the belt tightening is the only thing keeping the trousers up at the moment. The diabetes side of things have settled down which is encouraging. Having let my anxiety levels grow over the last week I am determined to not let it happen again, I need to focus on getting myself through of the challenges I currently face and support the people who need me. I need to focus on those who matter, my current situation and work and not let stupid rumours and gossip have their say.
I am also mindful that in a day or two I am going to be returning to the place I spent so much time with my mum during her final days. As I sit here now I am finding that prospect a little daunting but I know that come the day I will be alight. Well it is onwards and upwards and the next
four or five days at work are going to be very busy which is good. Hopefully I am finally getting out and about
driving tomorrow and I need to approach that with confidence and in a relaxed manner.
So on to the photographs. The first set are the self portrait or selfie's as they are called
The next two are some of the candid and more abstract things I saw whilst on my walk about. I am guessing that the t-shirt has been left by someone returning home from a night on the titles.
The next one caught my attention, rather than find somewhere suitable to dispose of their rubbish and realising that they cannot fit it in the bin they just dump it. I call it "Missed"
Now I love clouds they are so beautiful and so individual and I love spending time laying on the ground and watching them make their way across the sky. For me the clouds are like the thoughts and memories of the sky dark and heavy when they are angry and light and wispy when they are playful. Deeply thoughtful when they are big and tall and the skies mind is blank when there is a clear blue sky. When it is grey and overcast it is confused and anxious.
The next set are of St Mary's church, the weather was just perfect and I had a lot of fun including the patch of uncut grass into the various compositions I found. I was limited to my composition options because there was some sort of social gathering in the church and cars were parked all over the place.
I must admit this next one made me giggle, the idea of a wheelie bin being placed next to the tombstone of someones grave and trying to hide the fact behind a plant. I think it was only there temporarily but it does not feel or look right. I almost moved it but it was not my responsibility to do so, hopefully it is no longer there.
Now I have a thing for photographing signs, especially parking signs so could not resist this next one, it just had to be taken.
Until next time take care.
Si x
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