Finger wagging

Yesterday was the sixth straight day of work for me, doesn’t sound like much but speeding around with a big trolley full of up to eight customer shops is a challenge and heavy to boot.  Especially so when you are doing it for between 5 to 11 hours a day.  As a result I woke tired and with heavy legs and sore feet.  It did not help that I went to bed with a fretful and restless mind.  Things snowballed, as I did not have breakfast before I left and I forgot to take the mornings tablets or take them with me to work.  As a result my already troubled mood got slowly worse.  Now when I do not eat properly or forget to take my tablets my levels go all over the show usually a long way from where they should be.  This makes me very moody, sensitive to anything and everything and I find a normally dormant and little used temper rises from the depths.  Now rather than bite the head off anyone who tries to engage me in conversation I withdrawal into myself.  It is my fault that I found myself in this situation and I do not see why everyone else has to suffer it that is not fair.

This is when the finger wagging started and some very special work colleagues started to question why the normally bubbly and bouncy Si is quiet and keeping his self to his self.  I explained it to the first person to enquire and before I knew it the whole world knew and were shaking their fingers at me.  It is nice to work with such a caring bunch of people and be part of a team that on the whole looks after each other.  Well I managed to climb out of the darkness and get myself back into the land of all things that bounce and feel good and enjoyed yet another day of excellent banter and shopping.  Mind you we were shopping to the edge, up against the clock from early on.  Why I do not know but it was exciting chasing the clock.  Did you know we online shoppers could beat time?

I love my job so much and I have been told off about that too, I am working to many hours and days, more finger wagging at Si.  I have said it a thousand times and I will continue to say it, working at Sainsbury’s in the Goods Online department (GOL) is so challenging and rewarding.  I have never been so happy at work before and it feels so good.  I get up from my dreams and it is a drag to start each day but once I’ve said good morning to the world via Facebook it brightens up and the drive to work is the start of a good day ahead.  Every morning I pass one or two Muntjac deer grazing on the side of the road.  I do not stop as that will frightened them away but I slow down and say good morning.  What a way to start the day seeing something as beautiful as that.  Working the past week has been refreshingly pleasurable, the atmosphere relaxed with the humour and laughter infecting every aisle.  There is a grim determination that this is going to continue next week and for the foreseeable future.  We spend a lot of our short and precious lives at work so why not make the time as enjoyable as we wish the rest of our lives?

I love life, I love the people who I share it with and I love the fact that I appear to have a talent for capturing it with a camera.  I have come from a very dark place and I am determined not to allow my personal SatNav take me back there.  It keeps trying but I think I have the measure of it.  Yes it gets me lost every now and then but for once I am in control and that is thanks to the people I love, care for and who enjoy life as much as I do.  It makes me wish that we all were able to control out personal SatNav’s and find an inner peace limiting the emotional fallout to those close to us.  I feel sorry for those who cannot control their SatNav’s and find themselves in a dark place longer than necessary or get so lost they cannot be heard crying for help or have lost the ability to call out.  It could be said, and I have said it too, that there is no excuse for poor manners, bad attitude or aggressive behavior but do we consider where anyone displaying these issues finds themself?  The frustrating thing is that for the majority there is very little that can be done short term or at all as we are not allowed to be in a position to help.  It does not mean that their behaviour is acceptable but we need to workout the best way of either directly or indirectly pointing them in the right direction.  I do not like aggression or bullying and is something I am becoming more sensitive to and it is not me that is troubled.  It is sad when someone gets himself or herself so lost in the darkness that they cannot get out and that they have to really suffer in order to get to the point of having help forced upon them.

One of the regrets I have now that I have emerged from the darkness that surrounded me for so long is that I never explored my feelings through my photography completely.  It would have been interesting to photograph myself during that period, a missed opportunity for sure.

I have noticed that the daffodils are starting to come out so I need to pay a visit to a couple of churches to take some exterior photographs.  Especially as the weather forecast for the next few days is on the sunny side.

Well the hour is up and I am tired and need some beauty sleep.

Until the next time take care.

Si x